Rosemarie Smith

In honor of Mom, I’m going to keep this short and sweet!

This has been a very long and difficult week, but we have been able to get through it by coming together as a family – talking, listening, hugging and crying and maybe a few libations as well. We are all so very different but we were all raised the same. Family first, family forever.
Being up here is definitely not in my comfort zone. So, when tasked with this responsibility, I asked myself, “How am I going to get through this?” And then it dawned on me, I’ll get through it just like I did high school… I’ll plagiarize!
Everything you would want to say about Mom has already been conveyed through your social media posts and so…. I stole them!
*Allison called her an “Angel here on Earth” – she’s not wrong.
*Quentin reminded us that she impacted so many lives and gave so much love while here, and that growing up with her was a blessing.
*Elizabeth called her the strongest woman she ever knew –I’d include men as well.
*Grace called her welcoming, loving and thoughtful, and that Grandma always had a smile on her face.
*Ashley said she was the definition of unconditional love and family.
*MacKenzie added that any person who met her instantly loved her and she spread her warmth of love to so many.

Her strength… where did it come from? You can start with her childhood. Many of has have heard her tell the story of a thousand times. It was Germany and it was World War 2. The sirens would go off and everyone would meet in the bomb shelter. Nothing but candles and a radio. They could hear the plans and the bombs exploding in the distance. Her only brother, who would not return home, and her Father were fighting in the war, so it was her Mother and sisters waiting in the “bunker” for hours, waiting for the “all clear.” Terrifying for most, she said it was FUN! They’d sing and tell stories. She loved it.
She spent a lot of time with her sister (our Aunt Tina), her best friend. They would often get sent to collect berries and pinecones together. They would walk through the woods for miles to the next town, uphill both ways, and return by evening with baskets full. Tedious household chores were just a part of their everyday life. She was a great student and an even better singer.. who’s going to argue?

The war ended and the American’s came – one dapper soldier in particular. They met on a bridge in Herzogenaurach and soon were inseparable. Mom couldn’t shake Aunt Tina though. She often tagged along as the 3rd wheel. Mom barely spoke English and Dad knew very little German. Didn’t matter, they fell hard for each other. Last week, while going through Mom’s attic, we came across a suitcase full of their love letters. The grandkids enjoyed reading through some and laughed at just how schmaltzy there were. Schmaltzy or not, it was their truth.

They bought a home on Sampson Street and began building their family. After Gary, you think they would have stopped but no, they wanted more. 10 total. Money was tight, we didn’t have much, but it felt like we had it all. We never went without. Mom stayed home and raised all of us. Cooked, cleaned, did dishes, laundry – all of it, every day, and never complained. Mom would later proclaim to have never ever had one headache. Come on… Patty alone has migraine written all over it! I’m not buying that one.
She was a kid at heart. She had a little girl’s giggle and when she got to laughing she couldn’t stop. She got so much pleasure chasing the girl’s around the dining room table with a safety pin threatening to poke them. I believe she followed through on that a couple of times. She and Dad would do anything to try to embarrass us in public. Their PDA was probably the most effective. That “kid” mentality carried over in later years and seen through her interaction with the grandkids. She didn’t just watch them play, she would play with them.

Mom was very proud of her German heritage. She never forgot where she came from. She had a shelf full of music and videos from Deutschland and was not bashful about cranking up the polka on a Saturday afternoon. We were outside kids and good at sports mostly because being inside meant a night of Lawrence Welk or a Top 10 yodeling countdown. My favorite German tradition though… German potato salad. Absolutely nothing better. Mom’s was typically the first bowl empty at any potluck – it went fast. A few days ago, Tina did her Mother proud by whipping up her best representation. It was so very close and never stop trying to perfect it!

Proud, independent and stubborn. These attributes would serve her well after Dad died. As strong as our Mom was, we never saw at her lowest more than during that mournful period. It took her awhile, but she knew she had to carry on. There was a lot of life left to live. We needed her and she was there.
#1 Fan. Shortly after Dad died, we started a softball team. Murray Motors sponsored us and we played every Sunday for 23 years. Mom only missed 2 or 3 games at most, better than most of the players on the team. She loved going to games. If for nothing else, an excuse to get out of the house. She loved to talk. Once she got on a roll, it was hard to get her out of there. Church events, reunions, baby showers – it didn’t matter she wanted to go and was going to talk someone’s ear off.

Mom always said that if she could live to be 80, she’d be happy. Anything after that would be “bonus” years. She wanted an 80th birthday party and boy did she get one! My sisters put together the most incredible part for her that day. I don’t think I’ve ever seen her happier than on that day!
The “bonus” years proved to be tough though. Her body grew tired, her health was failing and it was time… time for the Reunion! 25 years have passed since Dad’s death, and Mom missed him. You could see it and hear it in how she would talk about him at Christmas, Easter or Thanksgiving.
So, as sad as it is for us, this truly is a celebration. A Celebration of Love and Family, 25 years has been too long. It would be selfish of us to keep her any longer.

The Bible tells us that if we are worthy, that St. Peter will greet us in Heaven. I believe that, just like I also believe that as Mom approached Heaven, St. Peter was tapped on the shoulder and that same dapper American soldier who’d been watching and patiently waiting for 25 years said to St. Peter, “Step aside St. Peter, I’ve got this one.”

Print